We like to try and keep things topical at NRD so we asked the league members who they had a *crush on in the world of roller derby, (and by crush we kind of meant those people who our league admired, aspired to be like or were inspired by.)
Turns out the members of Nottingham Roller Derby were too, shall we say, creative in their responses to form a full blog so we cobbled together some of the more serious responses.
Greek Frightening says the person she admires is Rosie Peacock. “She has come back from some pretty severe knee injuries and is still kicking ass and taking names in absolute style. I aspire to be as fluid and solid and confident and strong as she is.” Shock ‘N’ Awedrey agrees. She add’s “I just want to skate like her! And she’s got such a good presence and attitude on track. like emoticon.”
Cupid Stunt has a lot of love for the derby-verse he says; “I’ve got a lot of love for Igor Maniac. He’s got great knowledge, a really professional demeanour on game day and contrary to many impressions, is actually a lot of fun both during and after games. He’s keen to help others learn and develop and it’s all of these things that make me respect him.” Stop! Hannah Time agrees – she says; “I love Igor after having him as my HR. I tried to get out of JRing my first open game after having a bad scrim, and he talked me back into it by saying some lovely things and really helped me out on the day.”
Cupid Stunt also adds, “Calamity who NSOs with Dublin, has one of THE voices of derby. When she’s jam timing, there is no way you can’t hear her, it’s a voice direct from the bowels of the earth. She shared some tips on doing the role, which I feel have improved what I do there.”
Special K shares his love with us he most admires our very own Super Smash Brollers,he says, “Sounds like uber (Kraft) cheese, but going from a band of reprobates that didn’t look like a team to the amazing pack of lions that played at tattoo freeze is amazing. Major crush on the lionesses that keep them focused when they’re at the bench!”
So how will we win our crushes over?
There’s a few chat up lines we might use on our derby crushes:
“You make me weak at the knee pads”
“Hey girrrrl, were you assessed penalties for back block, high block and elbows? Because you got BAE written all over you!” – Nicky Situation
“Are you 27 in 5? ‘Cause you take my breath away!”
“lemme get your number…so I can send you to the box.”
(Almost all courtesy of Sharna the Dead & Nicky Situation)
Or we could woo them with our poetry:
- Circle Jerk:
Nosebleeds are red,
Bruises are blue,
I’d cut the track,
To hip check you
- Walker Texas Danger:
Legs are shaking,
Hands are clenched,
A skater in the making,
Your shirt is drenched,
Breath is gasping- 27 in 5,
Toes are curling,
You feel so alive.
One more lap and you reach PB,
Time is called,
So you take a knee,
A number is read; your fists are balled,
Your heart is pounding,
You reached your goal,
Return to the track, success resounding
- A haiku from Blackboard:
Uncertain on skates
Butterflies in her stomach
Derby love blossoms
- Special K (currently off injured):
If I were a jammer,
But then again no.
Or maybe a pivot,
In an SSB wall.
I know it’s not much,
But it’s the best I can do.
My gift is my gammy foot,
‘N it’s all for you!
- Blackboard:
Escape from New York,
Or maybe LA
When Skate Plissken’s on track
It ain’t the Jammer’s day
- Special K:
Pad rash is red,
Bruises are blue,
Walls are funny,
When you bash right through!
- Circle Jerk:
I love to play roller derby, Co-ed most of all,
Especially when jamming, and you skate into a wall,
You hit the sides, you hit the front,
But you have to be careful, lest you hit them in the…
back
- And don’t forget these wise words from Coco:
The roller girls wear green,
The Brollers wear blue,
Taken or Single, NRD loves you
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